BarleyLegal's Mail Bag

I don't have a Web-Forum, but I do have an In-Box

...and even that is to much work to deal with. Not every e-mail I receive, or write will end up here, but some of them are interesting, if not informative. Every time the Mail Bag is updated it will rise to the top of the Archive List like a clump of yeast in the carboy, have a brief moment in the light, then crash back down to the depths where it belongs.

Eric writes again:: In your ginger ale article you don't mention bleaching the stock pot. Is that because the boiling is adequate to kill any nasties?
BarleyLegal replies:: Hey.; Yes, a good rolling boil won't kill everything, but it will sanitize to the point that the yeast will be able to out compete the remaining bacteria for oxygen, and nutrients.; Also, you wouldn't want to bleach a stock pot, as that would cause pitting and corrosion.

Californiaguy662 Writes:: WORD! Y0ru b3r3 p4g3 iz l33t I l0ld! w00t!

j00 M4k3 b33r? GTFO!
D0nt j00 ph33r h4x0rzzz?; PEACE!
BarlyLegal Replies:: Thank you for the feed back.

Frank writes:: I'm writing to point out to you that your recent article concerning the hop shortage has a few glaring factual errors.; You claim that it's useless to list hop additions in IBU. That's quite simply absurd. Hop utilization can be plotted on a curve. This information is widely available, and so it's essential to predicting, or fallowing recipes that include mid boil additions.; You also neglect the subject of hop flavour. Bittering hops contribute flavour not just bittering, as do aroma hops. To claim that not doing mid boil additions will not impact the end product is laughable.; I found your article to be mediocre. Cleverly written perhaps, and while it may amuse teenagers, it was far from useful to the experienced brewer.
BarleyLegal replies:: Hi Frank.; Thanks for the feedback.; I sort of get your point, but let me ask you a couple questions just for a little clarification.; 1- What sort of utilization are you getting on your own system? I'm assuming you have used one of the IBU formulas.; 2- What does Goldings *taste* like?; 3- What do you do if you want to make a pilsner, but your short on Saaz? IOW: You won't have enough for the last two additions?
Frank replies:: I fail to see the relevance of your first question, but for your information I get approximately 96.42% Sometimes more if I'm doing a high gravity boil, commonly known as a "big beer".; If by "goldings", you are referring to East Kent Golding it has an earthy flavour profile (depending on the year); For a Pilsner, I would be loath to use anything other than Check Saaz, but in a pinch I might consider German Hallertau Mittelfrüh. Dose that satisfy your curiosity son?
BarleyLegal replies:: 96%? Wow. You must have the *good* formula.; On the question of Goldings, it has an earthy taste? So... you have tasted dirt??; I'm thinking that your just smelling an earthy smell overtop the bitterness that hits your tongue, and your nose and tongue together are interpreting that combination as a *flavour*.; Your idea about substatutions for a pilsner are ok, assumeing no shortage. What if you can't get any of that either? What if all you can get is a big bag of Northern Brewer, and two ounces of Mt. Hood?
Frank replies:: FUCK YOU!!! YOU PRETENTIOUS AMATEUR!!!

Tom writes:: Enlarge your penis!
Click on:
saul_has _ a_teenie_weenie.com

Eric writes:: I enjoyed your ginger ale article, but for the fact that you may be helping the terrorists. They could make some in glass bottles with too much sugar and give it to soldiers telling them not to open it until it is ready. If asked when that would be, they would reply "Oh, you'll know."; Spotting one spelling mistake of the annoying variety that spell checkers don't catch:; a complex and exiting beverage; should be; a complex and exciting beverage; unless that's a deliberate reference to having to pee.
BarleyLegal replies:: Hello Eric. Thanks for spotting that spelling error. To be honest I didn't know that there were two types of "exhighting". I must also confess that I found your point about terrorism quite sobering. Perhaps I should be more cautious about disseminating potentially dangerous knowledge on the internet.; I was planing on writing an article about how to improvise an explosive by stuffing extra DME, and oak chips into a canned beer kit. Thanks to your warning I've reconsidered.; As for the Ginger Ale article, I'm concerned, but optimistic. Terrorists, or at least the Muslim terrorists, have an irrational fear of alcohol, even in trace amounts. After finally overcoming there fear of basic science in order to improvise conventional explosives, I doubt they would be willing to risk the slippery slope of Ginger Ale.
Eric replies:: Why did they eliminate Latin from the curriculum? They made us study Inuit culture in Social Studies, but never introduced us to Latin, in spite of the fact we are constantly stumbling over it, while encounters with Inuit are relatively rare. Worse still, if you ran into an Inuit and asked if he'd made any bone harpoon tips whilst sitting in his igloo recently, thE response would likely be an unenlightening "Fuck OFF!". Oh well. Could be worse, I suppose. Especially if one was the Inuit. I had neglected to take into consideration the terrorist fear of alcohol. Your points are indeed most reassuring and have put my mind at rest. Thank you.
BarleyLegal replies:: Hi again Eric. I'm sorry I didn't respond to this immediately, but there is so much spam in my inbox that I often over look messages by accident. I don't know why they removed Latin, but I want to thank you for reminding me that the proper name for those people who live in igloos is "Inuit", rather than "Eskimos". I only quit watching television a few years ago, and I'm still in the process of rehabilitation.; Another strange phenomenon. A lot of people call native Americans "Indians", and yet they aren't from India. If I was from India, I would be unhappy with being labeled an "East Indian" just because some Italian got confused a couple hundred years ago. What are people form the west of India called? West-East Indians? For that mater. What about the people from the EAST of India? Are they called Eastern-East Indians?; To make things even more confusing, in England they refer to people from India as "Asians". Technically that's correct, but what do they call people from China? North Asians?
Eric replies:: Yes, I think the Indians, er, rather, Native North Americans, or is that First Nations enjoy our PC discomfort with regard to naming them. Some have even changed the names of their tribes from simple one or two syllable names to things like the klackmnklwatlsnrrgtkltklhoozagudkteh allegedly because that's what they knew themselves as a long time ago, but really I think so that they can feign indignation at mispronunciation and mis-spelling on our part. If we ever get it right, they'll change it again.; Did you have a look at my ginger ale article where I attempt to follow your recipe on barley legal?; http://backofthebook.ca/technology/2008/02/drink-tech.html; I hope it's ok that I lifted a frame from one of the cartoons. It links back. Let me know if you have a problem with such brazen snippage. I emailed you regarding it a few days ago, but it probably got lost amidst the drifting spam dunes.; BTW, I believe people from the west of India are called Pakies, if I'm recalling my geography correctly. I wouldn't want the pressure of being Extra East Indian, having to adopt an even more outrageously comical accent and all that.
BarleyLegal replies:: Hi Eric. Sure it's ok to use some of my images... It's not like I'm innocent of a little usage, myself.; I was impressed that you actually tried the ginger ale. In fact, I found it validating.; Also, good point on the issue of East Indians VS Indians VS people from the east of India. If we are to believe popular stereotypes of East Indians, then there must be corner stores in West India staffed by Extra East Indians, who are probably going to great lengths to be incoherent to there fellow countrymen. I don't think it's fair that they should have to work so hard just to compensate for our misappropriation of there Indianhood.